Posts by The Sunrise Warrior
Why I’ll Never Return To That Negative Self-Talk State Of Mind
*Trigger warning: substance abuse, sexual abuse. Today I live my life in the present with courage, purpose, and confidence in who I am, what I want, and why I want it. I am the Sunrise Warrior and my struggle is my strength. But it wasn’t always this way. It took work to get here. Not…
Read MoreI Know the Story I Want To Tell, But Which One Will He Hear?
I have something I am ready to share with someone I value in my life. I have a story of mentorship, hope, and appreciation I want to tell. But is that what he will hear? How do I craft my message? This post is about sorting shit out in my brain. I seem to do…
Read MoreIt Was Not One Fading Bad Dream. It Was So Much More
*Trigger Warning* Fading Memories Thirty-seven years ago, I began building walls around the memories of my child abuse to compartmentalize a traumatic and embarrassing time in my life. I was molested for seven long years, and I was ready to turn the page. My abuser saw the opportunity with me when my dad died. I…
Read MoreNo More Excuses. A Day In My Life As A Dad At One Hundred Percent!
Two of my kids were competing in a swim meet recently at our township pool. It was a great event and I had fun watching all the kids compete. My two swimmers, who aren’t the strongest swimmers on the team, did well and improved on their personal bests in five of their six races. Setting…
Read MoreIt’s About Darn Time. My Friends Are Going To Love The Real Me!
My Friends I was recently at the beach with a group of buddies I’ve been friends with for thirty-five years. They are a good group of friends and we have been doing this guy’s weekend for twenty-eight years. Over those years, we’ve shared a lot together…. graduations, jobs, marriages, promotions, career changes, kids, divorces, and…
Read MoreMy Second Battle With My Monster. This One Is For My Freedom!
How do you start a story about a truly sensitive subject, a subject that traditionally lives in layers and layers of secrecy? This is the question I’ve been asking myself as I journeyed to reassemble the pieces of the past that I buried years ago to process, grieve, and fuel my actions in a positive…
Read MoreRest In Peace, Dad. I Hope They Have Grape Jellies In Heaven!
Early Loss I find myself thinking about my dad often lately. He’s been dead for forty-four years, but it’s like he has been sitting next to me these last couple of years. I was six and my little brother was one when my dad died. My mother was a stay-at-home mom when he passed, but…
Read MoreCommunities Build Strength And Are Built One Person At A Time
Developing a community around my dark past was my first step towards healing from the deep wounds of child molestation. Every time I share my story with a person in my life, I heal a little more. I get stronger and more confident. I like to refer to this as getting comfortable in my own…
Read MoreI Love Roller Coasters! The Tale Of Three Experiences
Who Doesn’t Like Roller Coasters? My sunrise is much bigger than gaining control of my physical health. It’s about living with a healthy mind, body, and spirit. It has become woven into the inner fabric of my life. When my oldest child was born fourteen years ago, I became the fun parent. The one who…
Read MoreThe Man Who Scares Me Most Is Me. Will I Become A Monster, Too?
Nightmares of my Monster and Triggers Here is the fear that haunted me for so many years of my life…Will I one day become a pedophile like the monster who molested me? There is a popular myth that most pedophiles are victims of child molestation themselves. Did my molestation predispose me to this life sentence?…
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